Hah. After doing things that you think was the best for your friend and then was told that is actually the worst for your friend isn't bad enough for you to cry till your eyes are both swollen.
I know what is.
Shouting back at your father after you got home by taxi with 3 other guys you don’t know. They took the taxi with you because the taxi driver is trying to make more moneyby sending more people home at the same time.
Your reason for shouting at your father is because he bought you a phone that ring so softly that he had to give you 9 missed call in 6 minutes and you only pick up the 10th call. And he scolded you because you took the call 6 minutes after he started calling.
Then he left you alone at the shopping complex telling you that he will not fetch you home and you have to go home by yourself. And so you called your brother to fetch you.Your brother scolded you like your father because he thinks it’s your fault that you didn’t hear the bloody phone ring. Although your brother then promised that he will pick you up from the customs, he didn’t. And with that, you have to take the bloody Malaysia cab home by yourself. With 3 other guys that you don’t know. + the taxi driver. 4 guys.
And when you got home, your mother tell you that your father is super angry with you and all the fucking stuffs, you still have to greet her and say I’m home. After greeting her, you wanted to storm to your room and just sleep all the way through till tomorrow morning hoping your flu will be gone then and your father started to scold you again.
So you shouted back. And you got slapped.
Yes. directly at your left cheek.
Even the most optimistic person on earth cannot take it. EVEN ME. THE PERSON WITH THE MOTTO AS EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE CANNOT TAKE IT. BECAUSE FUCK IT, NOT EVEYTHING IS POSSIBLE.
GETTING SLAP BY YOUR FATHER AND STILL SMILE. HOW WILL IT EVER BE POSSIBLE?
KNOWING YOU DISAPPOINTED ONE OF YOUR MOST TREASURED FRIEND AND STILL SMILE AT HER TOMORROW. NOT POSSIBLE.
TRYING TO MAKE SURE YOU STILL GO FOR LESSON AND BAND PRACTICE WITH A HAPPY FACE AND DOING YOUR BEST IS NOT POSSIBLE TOO.
FUCK IT. FUCK LIFE.
I HAVE NEVER HATED MYSELF. AND TODAY, I HATE MYSELF. AND EVERYTHING I HAVE DONE TO MAKE ME HATE MYSELF.
be far away from me. I'm a sucker with no brains. and the last thing i will do is to care for my friends and family.
And for the first time in my life, i found out that, apologising is painful.