BUT ! My 3 most feared people when taking the bus would be...
- The Old uncles who worked night shift.
- The Aunties or Mamas who just finish shopping at the market.
- The working-in-office-with-thick-make-up-missys
well well. Let me explain a bit more. (this post will be super long)
Why old uncle who worked night shift ?
Honestly, i really have nothing against old people or people who work night shift. They need to earn for a living.
But. They DON'T have to SMELL LIKE CIGARETTE AND ALCOHOL COMBINED TOGETHER.
Uncle who smell like cigarette is actually ok. I don't mind people who smoke.
Not even my boyfriend. They want to smoke.. Just smoke la. As if i can stop them like that? The only rule is that, THEY CANNOT SMOKE IN FRONT OF ME. They can smoke beside me. BUT NOT IN FRONT. The reason is simply, cos if they stand in front of me, In the end, i'll be the one smelling like cigarette smoke.
Standing beside me is fine. OK? HAha.
Oh. back to uncles. Ahhs. ALCOHOL IS A NO-NO !
Not in front of me, not even beside me. DUN EVEN COME NEAR. 2 reasons.
1. I AM NOT LEGAL FOR DRINKING. AND IF I CAN'T DRINK, YOU DON'T DRINK IN FRONT OF ME. DUN EVEN SMELL LIKE YOU DRANK. OR I'LL BITE UR HEAD OFF.
2. Old uncles that drink smells pervertic. (especially when they look at you)
Ok ok.
As for boyfriend. They can drink, to a limit. They must be able to drink better than me. THAT is COMPLUSORY. Well. i don't know how much i can drink. So.. That'll wait.
OK ! yes. i know.. back to my post.
UNCLEs who work nightshift, tends to smell a bit weird. I believe u all know what i'm saying. So. with THAT smell. plus smoking and drinking.. Mixture of 3 different smells. WOah. UNCLE.
THAT is SUPER NOT TOLERATABLE. (who cares whether the spelling is correct or not)
So next..
Why aunties or mamas who just came out from the morning market?
HAHAHA. COS THEY SMELL OF FISH ?
I KNOW THAT.. maybe 10 or 20 years down the road, i'll be just like one of them. Bargaining in the market. Asking for 2 dollars less on the Fish head or something.
But i can't stand the smell of FISH market. IN THE EARLY MORNING. The only bus that can send me to school WILL HAVE TO pass by the FISH MARKET.
AND YES. LOADS OF AUNTIES WILL BOARD THE BUS. BECAUSE.. THEY HAVE TO. THat's the ONLY BUS. BLAH !
I'll explain more later.
Let me go on.
Why Ms-thick-make-up ?
THIS IS BECAUSE. they tend to have thick smell of perfume too. HOw do you describe it ? Thick perfume smell ? Over-power perfume smell ?
WELL WELL. I DO PUT ON PERFUME SOME TIMES. and i know the power of perfume.
and i know the correct amount to be on your body/shirt just to smell good for a single decent day.
BUT. MS-THICK-MAKE-UP-CUM-PERFUME-LADIES.. just seem to think, that decent amount of perfume is just not enough.
Hmm. I'm not going to comment about the thick make-up. Because some people just need thick make-up. To.. well... have more confidence? Or maybe just feel better.
Yea. Make up does create wonders. So thick makeup .. i'll not comment.
BUT THICK PERFUME IS TERRIBLE. I'm ok with perfume.
TOO MUCH PERFUME = no-no.
makes me want to sneeze. makes everyone want to sneeze too.
Heh.
Every morning. When taking bus to school. THOSE are my fears. Because the bus will have to pass by; 1st, loads of HDBs (this is where the thick-perfume ladies/woman board the bus) .. Then.. 2nd, Factory. (u know who will board the bus.). THEN. 3rd.. THE FISH MARKET. .. AND THEN.. BACK TO MORE FACTORIES. AND MORE AND MORe. THEN ! FINALLY MY SCHOOL.
Some of you might be wondering why fears? OK. Let me tell you. Every morning, I BET you will want some fresh air. HOW nice will it be if you nice fresh air on the bus is blocked by other smells? POLLUTED SMELLS.
Imagining the bloody smell. NO ONE WILL DARE TO TAKE A DEEP BREATH. Always staggering with breaths. MORNING U KNOW. zz. like that nice ah?
Okok. actually, there's ways to avoid these fears. Just stay away =)
AND yes. I made plans.
Plan A.
You all know the 4 seats facing each other at the very front of the buses ? I'll sit at the one facing front, the one beside the window.
Because. the only way to avoid the 3 fears is to sit IN FRONT of those mentioned above, so you will not have to breathe in whatever that is in front of you. Understand?
Actually the 4 seater seat is not a very good choice.The better choice is the VERY FIRST SEAT when you enter bus. but you'll look so super un-cool if you were to sleep at the VERY FIRST seat in the bus. (i don't know why). so.. the 4 seater looks better.
And people usually don't like sitting opposite my seat, because that would be facing the BACK of the bus. Some people just dun feel well seating at that position. Aunties with big plastic bags of fish will not take the vERY FRONT seat too. Because it will be very squeezy. Make-up-cum-perfume girl will not too. Because, as i said. it's UN-Cool.
AT THAT MOMENT WHEN I CHOSE THE PLAn, i forgot about the night-shift uncles. I FORGOT THAT.. THEY WILL PRACTICALLY JUST SIT EVERYWHERE WITH AN EMPTY SPACE.
AND SO. THERE's THIS UNCLE. WHO SMELT LIKE B.O + CIGARETTE SMOKE + BEER SAT IN FRONT OF ME.
DAMN.
BLOODY HELL U KNOW ?
AND HE CAN KEEP SMILING AT ME.
HAhaha. imagine ! you're already staggering with breathes. and some pervertic uncle is looking at you. HOW DISGUSTING ? ON A MONDAY MORNING !
HAhha. And that UNCle is the reason i'm posting this post. LOL.
OK. That was monday. I planned to post, but was a little too busy.
So. Tuesday is here.
I made a note to change my sitting position. I sat somewhere in the middle of the bus. (Those high+cramp seats)
I'm like " HAHA. I BET NO ONE WILL SEAT HERE. "
AND JUST THEN. THIS THICK MAKE-UP+PERFUME GIRL went up the bus. I just stared at her. She tapped her card. she walked.. walked.. AND. TA DA. SHE DIDN'T SIT.
SHE STOOD IN FRONT OF ME.
BECAUSE I'M SO STUPID.
I forgot there's ppl who stand. and .. HAHA. Yea. THICK PERFUME. Actually, it's quite ok. Cos it's a pleasant smell. It's just.. TOO STRONg.
Never mind that.
I doubled remind myself i have to post this post. But i'm still too busy and lazy.
THEN. Wednesday came.
woah . This is PLAN C ok.
I decided to sit near the back of the bus. The seat directly just behind the door. It's the first seat after the last door in the bus.
I planned VERY LONG u know. I estimate the place where people cannot stand infront of me or seat in front of me.
HAHA. IT's MY MASTER PLAN. HAHAHA.
AND GUESS WHAT HAPPENED !
BEcause i know i have to get down before the bus reach the interchange, of cos i will choose to seat the ' outside seat ' which is like.. another person can sit beside the window. Understand?
So i just sat there. smiling to myself on the way to school when the bus past the hdb flats and factory.
Fish market. HAha. My plan is working..
my plan is working well.. just before this aunty with 2 big bags of vegetables and FISH board the bus. (you will know it's fish, because the smell will be super strong) woah. She's looking for a seat. I helped her looked by turning around and hoping there's an empty space behind. AND. BLAH.
Murphy's law : when everything is right, something is wrong.
YEs. She smile and me and started to walk to the back of the bus.
I...
I smiled back.
She's still coming my way..
I..
I stood up..
She sat. the seat beside me. the window seat. the supposed perfect seat. she sat. she stuffed one of her big plastic bag underneath the seat. and held on to one on her lap.
She motioned me to seat back. I..
I wondered for a moment.
the bus stopped at the next stop and i'm still standing. I plan to stand all the way till my schools' bus stop..
AND THEn. THIS.. Uncle who just finished night shift boarded the bus. He is storming his way to the back of the bus. Finding a seat too.
I'm like " woah, if he sit beside the auntie.. i will not have to sit beside the auntie. "
THEN ! I think again. " IF HE SIT BESIDE THE AUNTIE, AND WITH ME STANDING AT A VERY UN-MOVABLE POSITION (the bus is full) .. THEN, I WILL HAVE TO BEAR THE 2 MIXED SMELL. "
So.. without second thought, i sat down. yes. beside the auntie.
(of course i took a deep breath before i sit down)
AND U KNOW WHAT?
THE UNCLE STOOD AT THE POSITION THAT I HAD just SECONDS AGO. WITH HIS 2 HANDS OPENED WIDE. WHICH MEANS..
HE STAND, FACING ME AND THE FISH AUNTY. WITH BOTH HIS HANDS STRETCHED OPENED.
HAh. I almost fainted.
Believe me. the moment i got down from the bus, i stood at the position and breathed in out in out in out in for at least FULL 30 seconds. STILL. JUST STANDING THERE, BREATHING.
ok.
I know i'm really bad to comment on them. BUT I HAVE TO. I'm SUFFERING FROM ALL THESE.
WHAT can i do ? WALK TO SCHOOL ?
HAHHAHa. Crazy. bus ride already 15 mins. walk = 1 hr? (i have short legs)
well well. that's my encounter for the past 3 days. Today was fine. I woke up late and took the 11am bus.
Not that much people compared to the 8.40am bus.
BUT i cannot do that everyday =.=
I NEED MY GRADES.
HAhaa. heh. i dunno how to end my post.
LOL. TA DA.
What a long post ya ?
Quite shocked too. I'm getting back my blogging habit. COOL.
