It was just another beautiful mistake ..

Events for today - 28th September 2007

well well. Have i told you i hate my new phone?

I believe not.

Ok. I HATE MY NEW PHONE.

sucky battery that cannot last for 2 days. BOOs.

I don't want to talk about it. Argh.

Ok. Today is just not a good day.
That's the conclusion.

RPWS had Lunchtime Concert at TRCC today.
2 practices and we played Dam Busters March, Carmen suite, Merry Widow.

How good can it be ?

It is 100% confirmed not our best performance.
It's really disappointing. Yes. I'm to blame too.

If only i worked harder. I would have been a greater help.
My fault. Yes. i blame myself.

And my toothache. I blame it on my toothache too.

Not because i'm trying to say it's beacause of my toothache that i didn't play well.
NAh. That's the last thing i will ever say.

I just blame it on my toothache because i will feel better.
at least. i know i can just blame it on my toothache and move on.

Focus on our next Performance or Concert!

Yea.

After the concert, my class celebrated 4 guy's birthday.
er. 3 guys on 28th sep. 1 guy on 29 sep.

we held a mini party for them. It was really mini.
Just hope that left a small memory for them.

(Here, i truly THANK weijian for the help!)

Ahs. After school. I rushed to Copthorne Kings Hotel for a wedding dinner.

And than, i have once again proven, Singaporeans are always late.
I rushed from school and got there, showered and changed and the time was 6.55pm.

The dinner stated that it will start at 7pm SHARP.

But. Due to people who are really spoiling my night, at 7.45pm, the ballroom is only 40% filled.
By 8pm, 50% filled. THE HALL IS ONLY FULLY FILLED AT 8.40pm !

And so, the dinner started at 8.45pm.

How nice.

Next time when i get married, i will state on the invitation card that, " FOOD WILL BE SERVED AT 7.20pm. AND THE DOORS WILL BE CLOSED AT 7.15pm SHARP. "

Well. There's actually something good that happened today.

During the wedding dinner, i asked my Mum whether i can order Alcohol drinks.

She nodded.

So i asked for beer. LOL.

totally NOOB la. I haven try anything alcoholic before. so i think i should start with beer before liquor. LOL

I THOUGHT BEER IS LEGAL AT ALL AGE =.=

The waiter asked me whether i'm 18. Lucky my cousin reacted fast and say i JUST past 18.

SO. I got a FULL CUP of beer. Woots.

Took a sip. aw. it taste really bad. i don't know why people like it so much.

My cousin say.. " BEcause it taste so bad, people just drink it " .
Something like the smelly tofu. People like it because it is smelly.
i haven try it before. and i doubt i will ever try it.

Ok. So as i said, my boyfriend MUST BE ABLE TO DRINK MORE than me.
I'm not sure how much alcohol i can take before i get drunk.

But i just know that. I took 2 full cups and i'm still super awake.
No drowsiness. Not a tiny bit. i knew that because i find myself still able to read my book =/

So, guys who cannot take more than 2 cups of alcohol, you're off the list. (for now.)
It's either you don't drink at all, or you can drink more than me.

(LOL. i sound as though i have loads of guys on my list like that. LOL ! I'm just anyhow-ing la. It's MY blog. LOL)

and ok. I'll post some pictures some other day.

And here, i'm answering a question from this guy.

Qns " Hey, it was nice talking on phone with you, so u like me? "

I didn't want to post the answer here, but it is you(theguy) who requested it.
Yea. he requested that i post my answer in my blog. For what reason?
I don't know. HAhaha.

Okok. Let me be clear. I called the guy. asked him about something which required 3 mins.
I'm clearly giving the signal to end the call.

But you(theguy) asked whether we can continue to chat. well. I seriously don't mind =.=
Chatting on the phone surely is fun.

Ok. I'm being direct here, i like you as a friend only. No deeper feelings than normal friends.
I hate beating around the bush, i will never act as though i like you when i don't.

It's wasting your time, as well as mine.

that's the end of the Q & A.

well, with what's above, i would like to tell you people something.
Hm, it's a old habit of mine. weird habit.

I will NOT call a guy that i like.
IF he call me, i will pick up. But i will NOT call him until after he call me.
It's not being stupid. It's just lack of courage.

Even if it's emergency, i will still NOT call. Yea. It's kind of weird. By yea. THat's That.

If i ever make a call to a guy before he call me, it will be confirmed that, the feeling that i have for the guy is totally just pure friendship.

So, i'm really careful with my phone calls.
and guys, if i haven call you before, dun think too much too.
Cos it's just maybe i don't need to call you. Yea.

(woah, i'm seriously sounding as though i have loads of admirers. haha)

Ah. What the hell is wrong with this post. I'm so weird. i'm sounding as though i'm this super pretty girl with long legs and nice body, with loads of admirers and all. LOL.

Mr Guy, i don't know why you want me to post the answer here. i find it really irritating and stupid but yet i'm still doing it. because you dun want to pick up ur phone and let me explain there. and the last thing i want is you thinking i like you. Sorry.

I hope we will still remain as friends ya. =)

Sorry peeps. Sorry for the . ahem. weird post.

I'm tired.

Good Night.

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Thursday, 27 September 2007

3 Most Feared People..

..when taking the morning bus.

Any idea who will they be ?

Ok. I don't know who will they be for you.

BUT ! My 3 most feared people when taking the bus would be...

- The Old uncles who worked night shift.

- The Aunties or Mamas who just finish shopping at the market.

- The working-in-office-with-thick-make-up-missys

well well. Let me explain a bit more.
(this post will be super long)

Why old uncle who worked night shift ?

Honestly, i really have nothing against old people or people who work night shift.
They need to earn for a living.

But. They DON'T have to SMELL LIKE CIGARETTE AND ALCOHOL COMBINED TOGETHER.

Uncle who smell like cigarette is actually ok. I don't mind people who smoke.

Not even my boyfriend. They want to smoke.. Just smoke la. As if i can stop them like that?
The only rule is that, THEY CANNOT SMOKE IN FRONT OF ME.
They can smoke beside me. BUT NOT IN FRONT.
The reason is simply, cos if they stand in front of me, In the end, i'll be the one smelling like cigarette smoke.

Standing beside me is fine. OK? HAha.

Oh. back to uncles.
Ahhs. ALCOHOL IS A NO-NO !

Not in front of me, not even beside me. DUN EVEN COME NEAR.
2 reasons.

1. I AM NOT LEGAL FOR DRINKING. AND IF I CAN'T DRINK, YOU DON'T DRINK IN FRONT OF ME. DUN EVEN SMELL LIKE YOU DRANK. OR I'LL BITE UR HEAD OFF.

2. Old uncles that drink smells pervertic. (especially when they look at you)

Ok ok.

As for boyfriend. They can drink, to a limit.
They must be able to drink better than me. THAT is COMPLUSORY.
Well. i don't know how much i can drink. So.. That'll wait.

OK ! yes. i know.. back to my post.

UNCLEs who work nightshift, tends to smell a bit weird. I believe u all know what i'm saying.
So. with THAT smell. plus smoking and drinking..
Mixture of 3 different smells. WOah. UNCLE.

THAT is SUPER NOT TOLERATABLE. (who cares whether the spelling is correct or not)

So next..

Why aunties or mamas who just came out from the morning market?

HAHAHA.
COS THEY SMELL OF FISH ?

I KNOW THAT.. maybe 10 or 20 years down the road, i'll be just like one of them.
Bargaining in the market. Asking for 2 dollars less on the Fish head or something.

But i can't stand the smell of FISH market. IN THE EARLY MORNING.
The only bus that can send me to school WILL HAVE TO pass by the FISH MARKET.

AND YES. LOADS OF AUNTIES WILL BOARD THE BUS. BECAUSE..
THEY HAVE TO. THat's the ONLY BUS. BLAH !

I'll explain more later.

Let me go on.

Why Ms-thick-make-up ?

THIS IS BECAUSE. they tend to have thick smell of perfume too.
HOw do you describe it ? Thick perfume smell ? Over-power perfume smell ?

WELL WELL. I DO PUT ON PERFUME SOME TIMES.
and i know the power of perfume.

and i know the correct amount to be on your body/shirt just to smell good for a single decent day.

BUT. MS-THICK-MAKE-UP-CUM-PERFUME-LADIES..
just seem to think, that decent amount of perfume is just not enough.

Hmm. I'm not going to comment about the thick make-up.
Because some people just need thick make-up. To.. well...
have more confidence? Or maybe just feel better.

Yea. Make up does create wonders. So thick makeup .. i'll not comment.

BUT THICK PERFUME IS TERRIBLE.
I'm ok with perfume.

TOO MUCH PERFUME = no-no.

makes me want to sneeze. makes everyone want to sneeze too.

Heh.

Every morning. When taking bus to school. THOSE are my fears.
Because the bus will have to pass by; 1st, loads of HDBs (this is where the thick-perfume ladies/woman board the bus) .. Then.. 2nd, Factory. (u know who will board the bus.). THEN. 3rd.. THE FISH MARKET. .. AND THEN.. BACK TO MORE FACTORIES. AND MORE AND MORe. THEN ! FINALLY MY SCHOOL.

Some of you might be wondering why fears?
OK. Let me tell you.
Every morning, I BET you will want some fresh air.
HOW nice will it be if you nice fresh air on the bus is blocked by other smells?
POLLUTED SMELLS.

Imagining the bloody smell. NO ONE WILL DARE TO TAKE A DEEP BREATH.
Always staggering with breaths. MORNING U KNOW. zz. like that nice ah?

Okok. actually, there's ways to avoid these fears. Just stay away =)

AND yes. I made plans.

Plan A.

You all know the 4 seats facing each other at the very front of the buses ?
I'll sit at the one facing front, the one beside the window.

Because. the only way to avoid the 3 fears is to sit IN FRONT of those mentioned above, so you will not have to breathe in whatever that is in front of you.
Understand?

Actually the 4 seater seat is not a very good choice.The better choice is the VERY FIRST SEAT when you enter bus. but you'll look so super un-cool if you were to sleep at the VERY FIRST seat in the bus. (i don't know why). so.. the 4 seater looks better.

And people usually don't like sitting opposite my seat, because that would be facing the BACK of the bus. Some people just dun feel well seating at that position.
Aunties with big plastic bags of fish will not take the vERY FRONT seat too. Because it will be very squeezy. Make-up-cum-perfume girl will not too. Because, as i said. it's UN-Cool.

AT THAT MOMENT WHEN I CHOSE THE PLAn, i forgot about the night-shift uncles.
I FORGOT THAT.. THEY WILL PRACTICALLY JUST SIT EVERYWHERE WITH AN EMPTY SPACE.

AND SO. THERE's THIS UNCLE. WHO SMELT LIKE B.O + CIGARETTE SMOKE + BEER SAT IN FRONT OF ME.

DAMN.

BLOODY HELL U KNOW ?

AND HE CAN KEEP SMILING AT ME.

HAhaha. imagine ! you're already staggering with breathes. and some pervertic uncle is looking at you. HOW DISGUSTING ? ON A MONDAY MORNING !

HAhha. And that UNCle is the reason i'm posting this post. LOL.

OK. That was monday. I planned to post, but was a little too busy.

So. Tuesday is here.

I made a note to change my sitting position.
I sat somewhere in the middle of the bus. (Those high+cramp seats)

I'm like " HAHA. I BET NO ONE WILL SEAT HERE. "

AND JUST THEN. THIS THICK MAKE-UP+PERFUME GIRL went up the bus.
I just stared at her. She tapped her card. she walked.. walked..
AND. TA DA. SHE DIDN'T SIT.

SHE STOOD IN FRONT OF ME.

BECAUSE I'M SO STUPID.

I forgot there's ppl who stand. and .. HAHA. Yea. THICK PERFUME.
Actually, it's quite ok. Cos it's a pleasant smell. It's just.. TOO STRONg.

Never mind that.

I doubled remind myself i have to post this post.
But i'm still too busy and lazy.

THEN. Wednesday came.

woah . This is PLAN C ok.

I decided to sit near the back of the bus. The seat directly just behind the door.
It's the first seat after the last door in the bus.

I planned VERY LONG u know. I estimate the place where people cannot stand infront of me or seat in front of me.

HAHA. IT's MY MASTER PLAN. HAHAHA.

AND GUESS WHAT HAPPENED !

BEcause i know i have to get down before the bus reach the interchange, of cos i will choose to seat the ' outside seat '
which is like.. another person can sit beside the window. Understand?

So i just sat there. smiling to myself on the way to school when the bus past the hdb flats and factory.

Fish market. HAha. My plan is working..

my plan is working well.. just before this aunty with 2 big bags of vegetables and FISH board the bus. (you will know it's fish, because the smell will be super strong)
woah. She's looking for a seat. I helped her looked by turning around and hoping there's an empty space behind. AND. BLAH.

Murphy's law : when everything is right, something is wrong.

YEs. She smile and me and started to walk to the back of the bus.

I...

I smiled back.

She's still coming my way..

I..

I stood up..

She sat. the seat beside me. the window seat. the supposed perfect seat.
she sat. she stuffed one of her big plastic bag underneath the seat. and held on to one on her lap.

She motioned me to seat back.
I..

I wondered for a moment.

the bus stopped at the next stop and i'm still standing. I plan to stand all the way till my schools' bus stop..

AND THEn. THIS.. Uncle who just finished night shift boarded the bus. He is storming his way to the back of the bus. Finding a seat too.

I'm like " woah, if he sit beside the auntie.. i will not have to sit beside the auntie. "

THEN ! I think again. " IF HE SIT BESIDE THE AUNTIE, AND WITH ME STANDING AT A VERY UN-MOVABLE POSITION (the bus is full) .. THEN, I WILL HAVE TO BEAR THE 2 MIXED SMELL. "

So.. without second thought, i sat down. yes. beside the auntie.

(of course i took a deep breath before i sit down)

AND U KNOW WHAT?

THE UNCLE STOOD AT THE POSITION THAT I HAD just SECONDS AGO.
WITH HIS 2 HANDS OPENED WIDE. WHICH MEANS..

HE STAND, FACING ME AND THE FISH AUNTY. WITH BOTH HIS HANDS STRETCHED OPENED.

HAh. I almost fainted.

Believe me. the moment i got down from the bus, i stood at the position and breathed in out in out in out in for at least FULL 30 seconds. STILL. JUST STANDING THERE, BREATHING.

ok.

I know i'm really bad to comment on them.
BUT I HAVE TO. I'm SUFFERING FROM ALL THESE.

WHAT can i do ? WALK TO SCHOOL ?

HAHHAHa. Crazy. bus ride already 15 mins. walk = 1 hr? (i have short legs)

well well. that's my encounter for the past 3 days.
Today was fine. I woke up late and took the 11am bus.

Not that much people compared to the 8.40am bus.

BUT i cannot do that everyday =.=

I NEED MY GRADES.

HAhaa. heh. i dunno how to end my post.

LOL. TA DA.

What a long post ya ?

Quite shocked too. I'm getting back my blogging habit. COOL.

Cheers. I'm ending it now.

So do u fear anyone when u board a bus? =)

Good Night.

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Wednesday, 26 September 2007

Haha. I realize i haven't post anything nice to read these few days.

Life is too good to just blog =/

I'm so loving my headset, loving every moment i spend with my headset.

The only thing i want to talk about is the songs i'm listening and blasting.

Other than that, i have no will to do anything.

I've been jotting down so many things to post about in my little note book.
Just don't have the patience to post them. Hahs.

My time is just for blasting on my favourite song. ^^

I'll see what i can do about it soon. Heh.

And PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE. I believe most of you have read the EMO post.

EMO is VERY EMOTIONAL. ME PUTTING MY FAV SONG LYRIC AS MY MSN NICK IS NOT EMO. AND I AM 100% NOT EMO. I'M HAP LA. DON'T SPOIL MY MOOD PLS.

Ok. Heh.

P.s - WeiJian. Heh. no need keep refreshing my blog screen. ^^

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Saturday, 22 September 2007

EMO ?

What do you think EMO mean?

Honestly, I really don't know.
I always think, those people who uses the eyeliner and draw really dark lines at their eyes, put white powder till their face is super white.. Grow really long hair, paint black nails.. put red lipstick..

I think those people who have a combination of a few of what is stated above would be those ' EMO people '.

Well. i really don't know.

Okay. well actually i know. But then, i think i don't too.

I always ask my friends. " You all always say Emo emo emo, what does it actually mean ? "

they say. it means EMotional.

So.. the meaning of emotional is..

e·mo·tion·al / Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[i-moh-shuh-nl] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–adjective

1. pertaining to or involving emotion or the emotions.

2. subject to or easily affected by emotion: We are an emotional family, given to demonstrations of affection.

3. appealing to the emotions: an emotional request for contributions.

4. showing or revealing very strong emotions: an emotional scene in a play.

So.. EMO is short form for too much emotional?

When i play the piano, and my teacher says... More expression of emotions please..

So i'll have to be EMO ?

I wonder alot about this stupid word ok?

I really do think most people don't understand the word.

Sometimes, when i post i'm really sad that particular day.. Or i feel stupid for something i did..

People says i'm EMO. What's THAT ?

LOL.

A single feeling of being sad doesn't mean i'm VERY affected by emotions. =/

Still don't get it ?

Nvm =/

Seriously. Meixian, Rachael and me were talking about this stupid word just now.

EMo. short form of EMotional?

Well well.

So. The short form for Happy is Hap ?

I'm so Hap. ( I'm so Happy )

What's Hap? ( What's Happening? )

So Hap ah? ( So Happening ah? )

Hapness sia. ( Happiness sia. )(well, it sounded more like.. helpless)

HAP HAP HAP HAP HAP vs EMO EMO EMO EMO EMO

Toot sia. MAKE THE TREND. WE're HAp People !

we're a hap fam. we hav man she and cow in e far.
we use e she to mak clo n use e cow to coo stea.

Okays. Good Night PEople !

To everyone(includingme) who fell sick due to the deathly weather;
DO GET WELL SOON ! DRINK MORE WATER =)

TAKE CARE !

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Friday, 21 September 2007

Where'd you go.

I miss you so.

Seems like it's been forever that you've been gone.

- Good Night -

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Wednesday, 19 September 2007

My Top 10 PLaylist Tonight.

1. Ghost Love Score - Nightwish
2. Fear of the Dark - Children of Bodom
3. Ghost Love Score - Nightwish
4. Ghost Love Score - Nightwish
5. Warcry of Salieri - Warmen
6. Ghost Love Score - Nightwish
7. Stairway to Heaven - Royal Choral Society
8. Fear of the Dark - Children of Bodom
9. Stairway to Heaven - Royal Choral Society
10. Ghost Love Score - Nightwish

I wasted my time to fall for you.

Good Night.

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Story of Love.

Tulips. lovely tulips.

Hms. tulips.

--
There's this sentence that i really like.
[ Leaf departure is because of Wind pursuit. Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay]

If you found someone you love, DON'T act as if it is something you don't care.
Love is a war in the heart. And a war best not to be lost.
If someone caught your eye, Confess. Do it before you lost the chance.

- A very long love story -

Tree

The reason I'm called tree is because I'm good at painting trees. Overtime I start
to use a tree on the right hand corner as a trademark for all my watercolors painting.

I have dated 5 gals when I was in Pre-U. There's one girl who I love a lot but
never dare go after. She doesn't have a pretty face, doesn't have a good
figure, and doesn’t have outstanding charm. She is just a very ordinary gal. I like
her. I really like her. Like her innocent, like her frankness. Like her cuteness, like
her intelligence and her fragility. Reason for not going after her is because I felt
somebody so ordinary like her is not a good match for me.

I'm also afraid that after we are together all the good feelings will vanish. I'm
also afraid other's gossips will hurt her. I felt that if she's my gal, she will be
mine ultimately & I don't have to give up everything just for her. The last reason,
made her accompany me for 3 years.

She watched me chase after gals, and I have made her heart cry for 3 years.
She wants to be a good actress and I'm a very demanding director. When I
kissed my 2nd girlfriend, she bumped into us. She was embarrassed but smile &
say "Go on!" before running off.

The next day, her eyes were swollen like a walnut. I purposely didn't want to
think about what causes her to cry but laugh at her the whole day. When
everybody go back home, she was alone crying in the classroom. She didn't
know that I returned from soccer training to get something. I watch her cry for
an hour or so.

My 4th girlfriend didn't like her. There was once when both of them quarreled. I
know that based on her character she's not the type that will start off the
quarrel. But I still sided with my girlfriend. I shouted at her and her eyes were
filled with shock. I didn't care about her feelings and walked off with my
girlfriend. The next day, she still laugh & joke with me like nothing has ever
happened. I know that she's very hurt but she didn't know that my heart ache is
as bad as hers.

When I broke up with my 5th girlfriend, I asked her out. After going out for a
day, I told her that I have something to tell her. She told me that coincidentally,
she has something to tell me too. I told her about my break up and she told me
about her getting together. I know who's the guy. He has been going after her
for quite a while.

A very cute guy full of energy, lively and interesting. His pursuit for her has been
the talk of the school. I can't show her my heart ache but could only smile &
congratulate her. When I reach home, the heart ache is so strong that I can't
stand it. It's like a heavy weighted stone on my chest. I couldn't breathe.
Wanted to shout but can't. Tears rolled down I broke down & cry. How many
times have I seen her cry for the man that doesn't acknowledge her presence too?

During graduation, I read a sms in my hp. It was sent 10 days ago when I broke
down and cry. I haven't read it since then. It says "Leaf departure is because
of Wind pursuit. Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay"

Leaf

During Pre-U days, I like to collect leaves. Why? Because I feel that, for a leaf to
leave the tree she has been relying on for so long takes a lot of courage.
During the 3 years of Pre-U I was on very close terms with a guy. Not BGR kind
but as buddy kind. But when he had his 1st girlfriend, I learnt a feeling I never
should have learnt - Jealousy. The sourness in the heart can't be described by
using a lemon. It's like 100 rotten sour lemons. Sourness to the extreme limit.

They were only together for 2 months. When they broke up, I hide my strong
sense of happiness. But after a month, he got together with another gal. I like
him & I know he likes me. But why won't he pursue me? Since he love me why
doesn't he want to make the first move? Whenever he had a new girlfriend, my
heart would hurt. Time after time, my heart was hurt.

I begin to suspect that this is a one sided love. If he don't like me, why does he
treat me so well. It's beyond what you will normally do for a friend. Liking a
person is very heart wrenching. I can know his likes, his habits. But his feelings
towards me.. I can never figure out. You can't expect me, a girl, to ask him right?
Despite that, I still want to be by his side. Care for him, accompany him, love
him. Hoping that one fine day, he will come and love me. It's like waiting for his
phone call every night, wanting him to sms me. I know that no matter
how busy he is, he will make time for me. Because of this, I waited for him.

The 3 years were the hardest to go through & I really want to give up.
Sometimes, I wonder should I continue waiting. The pain and hurt, the dilemma
accompanied me for 3 years. Till the end of my 3rd year, a 2nd year junior
starts to go after me. Everyday he pursuit me relentlessly. From outright
rejection to a point in time when I felt that I'm willing to let him have a small
footing in my heart. He's like a warm, gentle wind, trying to blow a leaf away
from the tree.

In the end, I realized that I didn't want to only give this wind a small footing in my
heart. I know this wind will bring this badly battered leave far away to a better
land. Finally I left tree, but the tree only smile & didn't ask me to stay.

Wind

I like a gal called leaf. Because she's so dependent on tree that I have to
be a gust wind. A wind that will blow her away. When I first met her, it was 1
month after I transfer to the new school. I saw a petite person looking at my
seniors & me playing soccer. During ECA time, she will always be sitting there.
Be it alone or with her friends looking at him. When he talks with gals, there's
jealousy in her eyes. When he looked at her, there's a smile in her eyes. Looking
at her became my habit. Just like she likes to look at him.

One day, she didn't appear. I felt something amissed. I can't explain the feeling
except it's a kind of uneasiness. The senior was also not there as well. I went to
their classroom, hid outside and saw my senior scolding her.

Tears were in her eyes while he left. The next day, I saw her at her usual place,
looking at him. I walked over and smiled to her. Took out a note & gave to her.
She was surprised. She looked at me, smiled & accepted the note.

The next day, she appeared & passed me a note and left. "Leaf's heart is too
heavy and wind couldn't blow her away."

"It's not that leaf heart is too heavy. It's because leaf never want to leave tree."
I replied her note with this statement and slowly, she started to talk to me and
accept my presents & phone calls.

I know that the person she love is not me. But I have this perseverance that
one day I will make her like me. Within 4 months, I have declared my love for
her no less than 20 times. Every time, she will divert away from the topic. But I
never gave up. If I decide I want her to be mine, I will definitely use all means to
win her over. I can't remember how many times I have declared my love to her.
Although I know she will try to divert but I still bear a small ray of hope. Hoping
that she will agree to me my girlfriend.

Few days before her graduation day, I called her as usual. Bearing my small ray
of hope, I asked whether she would agree to be my girlfriend. I didn't hear
any reply from her over the phone. I asked "what are you doing? How come you
didn't want to reply?". She said, "I'm nodding my head". "Ah?" I
couldn't believe my ears. "I'm nodding my head" She replied loudly. I hang up
the phone, quickly changed and took a taxi and rush to her place and pressed her
door bell.

During the moment when she opened the door. I hugged her tightly.

[Leaf departure is because of
Wind pursuit. Or because Tree
didn't ask her to stay.]

--

I felt that this is a piece of very special essay.

A very special story too.

I read it when i'm Secondary 3.

How do you feel after reading?

--

Confess to the one you love before you lose him/her.

--

Lol. I can't believe i'm asking people to confess when ME MYSELF will not confess to
the person i like.

Losing them seems to be my habit already.

But it takes too much for me to confess.
It really takes alot for a girl to confess.

--

Ahhh Ahdadada ~

The story is actually in Chinese. But i believe an English version would be better in my blog.

Hope you all enjoyed.

^^

<@ love is in the air @>

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Tuesday, 18 September 2007

sigh.

I'm going to get my headset tomorrow.

TOMORROW IT SHALL BE ! NO MORE DELAYS !

--

band day. staying in sg today.

miss Rachael.

miss Ruiwen.

miss 348.

Lonely week.

348 = 6 girls.

Elaine at Aussie.
SiYing and WeiTing studying for Exam (J.C)
RaChael and MeiXian working at changi. (SP)

Ruiwen disappeared.

--

Life is hard.

I can hardly believe my post are getting shorter and shorter nowadays.
Amazing ya? I believe everyone should prefer it to be like this.

Short and All.

New class is very competitive.
If i dun pay attention for a min, i lost the battle for good grades.
Stress.

--

I smile for the best reasons.

Qi the greatest warrior wave her silverish-red sword in the air.

- we're protected by our circle of love -

** Chills. I'll be back to my old posting style soon. bit sick and busy these few days.

Cheers.

Nights.

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Monday, 17 September 2007

iwantaheadset,iwantaheadset,iwantaheadset!

tomorrow.tomorrow.tomorrow.

it'smine.it'smine.it'smine.

goingto.goingto.goingto.

blast.blast.blast.

fearofthedark.fearofthedark.fearofthedark.

now.and.forever!

haha ~ well.

Sorry people. The pictures will not be posted in my blog so soon. if you guys want it, do find me in msn to get it. (Pictures that are sent out will not be posted in my blog anymore.)

Chills !

1 2 3 4 5 ~

5 4 3 2 1 ~

Play with all your friends.
Stay tuned !

- I smile for the greatest reason. -

Qi is the Greatest Warrior ! ^^

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Sunday, 16 September 2007

Ahs. Went to Sws Concert today..

With...

Gabriel, Willie, Weiwei, Ronald, Lihua, Dennis, Enoch, Shannon, HuiCi, Sarimah, Vanessa_trumpet, SongRen, Jun Hao and SadiQ.

So many people. Yups.

To support Captain Yusri and Shirley =)

went to burger king for dinner.

well. many more things happened. but i'm too tired to talk about it.

Anyways. We took quite some pictures. Nice ones =)

Well, some not that nice ones too.

Dun worry. I only like posting nice pictures.

well well. but i'll post them some other time.

A message for those who kept refreshing my blog screen for ..

RPWS SCANDAL - post no.2

I'll not be posting the next rpws scandal post so soon.

DON'T ask why. I have my reasons. ^^

^^ cheers.

Good Night !

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Saturday, 15 September 2007

Rose or Tulip?

boy vs man.
love vs friendship

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Friday, 14 September 2007

Life is so Fragile.

Few days ago, when i'm doing the RPWS scandals' post..

A baby lizard fell on my leg.

-shivers-

I screamed and anyhow-ly pushed it off my leg.

I jumped on my bed. took my laptop, and ran to my dressing room.

Crazy. Then i walked back into my room, the lizard is on the floor beside my bed.

Haha.

So i spent the night on my sisters' bed. (well, she's away.)

The next morning, when i woke up, the first thing i did was to look for the lizard.
So i created all sorts of noise to disturb the lizard.

Yea. i saw it. On the wall, near my bed.

Went to find a broom and a dustpan.

When i came back.. IT IS GONE.

woah. I thought it might fall from the ceiling again. So i ran out of the room..

And never went back till night.

I can feel it's still there. somewhere around. So i took my blanket..

Gave it a hard shake, and took it to the dressing room with me.

Yea. I slept on the sofa yesterday night.

Actually i didn't want to.

But thanks to SadiQ, who helped me with the research on how long can a lizard live without food.

.. Thanks to him. i learn that, lizard can live up to days or even months without food.

So i just spend the night on the sofa.

Bad experience. DON'T try it.

I woke up with a backache, cramped neck.

Haha ! And i decided to really chase that lizard out of my room !

so, i started making all sort of noise, pulling both my bed and my sister's bed away from the wall..

And.. i almost fainted when i saw what i saw.

The baby lizard is dead. It turned black..

On the floor at the corner of the room. (just beside my sisters' bed)

I screamed for my mother.. heh. that's the only thing i can think of at that moment.

So.. my mother used few pieces of tissue paper and picked up the lizard. Gave it some prayers.. and i dun know what she did after that.

Dustbin. OR maybe. Garden.

well. my garden is still under renovation, so i think it's the dustbin.

Sigh. Life is so fragile. The baby lizard is hatched. with no parents to feed it.

It wondered in my room for so many days. It died.

A picture of baby lizard :

--

Just now. when i'm on the way home in my dad's car..
There's this news. That made me really want to tell all people out there to really cherish their life..

The news was..

There's this accident as this place.

The accident wasn't the main thing.

It's about this lorry that carry pipes.
Those really really long and thick and heavy pipes for making buildings.

This lorry suddenly brake. Then the pipes fell backwards, off the lorry.

It hit the front window of the car behind, broke the panel, went thru the driver.

The driver was announced dead on the spot.

He's a 38 years old Indian guy.

There's always accidents going on.
Because accidents are so often happening, we dun really care.

But i felt a gush of pain when i heard the news.

I started to think. 38 year old man.

Should be married with kids. Indian guy. probably 2 kids.

It's like. a woman is now widowed with 2 kids.

Who is going to support them?

Sigh. Life is so Fragile.

I have friends who told me they want to die early, they think being alive is torture.

But hey. There's so many people who would want to change their life with you ok !

I believe that 38 year old indian guy. i'm sure he wants want to raise his kids up.
see them graduate from university and get married off.

I believe the baby lizard wants to get older and find a mating partner.

I believe there's so many things to do that then to waste your time there thinking how you can die early.

--

I'm someone who view life strongly.

Today i was really sad. something bad happened to me.

People starts telling me to "not do any foolish things ok?"

argh. dun worry. The last thing i will do is to slast my wrist or eat colgate.

I rather appreciate people telling me..
" tomorrow will be a better day " or maybe " you still got me ".

HAha. Anyways. My post is totally about telling you people how fragile is life.
Live your life to the fullest every day !

Cheers.

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Thursday, 13 September 2007

RPWS SCANDALS ?

YES ! RPWS' SCANDALS !

No point warning. Because no matter what, you people will still scroll down ya?

Anyways, to prevent people from saying i didn't warn, i shall warn.

- WARNING -

This post is totally my own creation.
It may be hilarious, It may be hurting, It might somehow be nice.

If you are not steady enough for jokes, you should leave now.

- End of Warning -

I still think no matter what, you people will still scroll down.

LOL.

Let me briefly tell you how it all happened.

I was blog hopping. And the bloody idea struck on me. Somehow.

I think i saved 30 over pictures over the blogs.

And i made a mind-map from them.

Well not A mind-map. i made 3, and i finally combined everything to 1.

Here it is.

Mind-map 1

It's more like a Draft.

Mind-map 2.

slightly better than a draft..

Mind-map 3.

This was actually the final.. Until i realize i forgot to connect SOMEONE to SOMEONE.

So, here's mind-map 4. THE FINAL ONE.

TaDa !

Well, you all dun have to look at the mind-map first.
Because you all will be wondering what the heck is it.

I think you all might need to refer to the mind-map AFTER the whole post.

Cheers. Let us start with the REAL thing.

HAha ! Jordan and Sherline. NO ONE WILL EVER THINK OF THIS.
But seriously, the picture DOES look like wedding photo. TRUE?

If only Jordan put his hand somewhere else. LOL.

NExt is Sherline again. (aw, it is PURE coincidence.)

Gabriel and Sherline. Ahhhs. I didn't do anything. =)

We'll have more and more suprises.

Phylis and Jasmine.. Something going on?
OR IS IT ONE-SIDED?!

Jasmine didn't respond at first...

But...

She did afterall.

I wonder is there anything between Naf and Jasmine. wonder and wonder.. you'll know soon.

A new rival for phylis?

Hmm..

3 is a crowd. 4 is ? .. 2 pair of SANDALS. sandals DO come in pairs.

Next comes a very innocent pair of....

Friends i think..

Definetly friends ! Cassandra is too sweet to be a scandal. ROAR.
No choice, this is the only picture Cassandra is in. I HAVE TO post it.

Hm. It's getting a little bored isn't it ?

Chill chill. There's 20 + more pictures coming up.
I HAVE to stop and talk once in a while. I AM the post-guide for the post.

I think Jasmine is getting another scandal..

So is Naf.

2 on 1. THEY SHARE?
Shee Rui, how is it going ? Hmm hmm.

I think shee rui is irritated by all the loves.
FOR GODSAKE. SHE's TUNING HER INSTRUMENT.

Do pick a better timing ya, girls ?

And yes, i heard Gabriel and Jasmine is scandaling.

Now i understand why...

Now i understand why Gabriel is quite down that day.
sigh -

And Jasmine changed the situation super fast !

Ta Da !

Here's JAsmine. and.. NAF ? oh dear, i didn't draw a line for Gab and Naf.

And.. Weiwei came into the picture ?

Hmm.. can't blame him..

Because.. They.. are.. also.... TOGETHER?!
Hmm.

Ok ok. Enough of Jasmine. Too much spotlight on her might make her melt.
(melt?.. dun ask me why. i just thought of it randomly.)

Next comes a group of...

Girls.

aHAR. Another 2 on 1 situation.
Well well. the author didn't realize Sarimahs' hand on Hirdas'.
hm. you may elaborate it yourself.

Next is a interval. A break for the eyes.

Our DEAR PRESIDENT.
I have totally no idea what's his hand for.
But it seems interesting. So i just invented something for him.

I don't think willie and sherline should count as a scandal.

They looked more like Daddy and Mummy acting cute.

I'm getting a little bored from the post already.

I shouldn't have took so many pictures.

Hm. Next is a pair that we know long ago..

No suprise from this. They had been like that since.. Forever..
Hm.

Here comes something really frustrating.

For this, you all dun have to understand why.
I just want to show my love to you all.
There ~ CPC. ^^

I wonder is someone leaning too close?

And so, our A.C.M saved the day..

I'm happier with this picture.

So. let's continue..

I actually wondered for a bit. But i think i'll stick with No Doubt.
SJ, you should really let ur hair down.
And Sarimah.. Where's HuiCi?

then then..

Here comes Jasmine again.
They seriously look very sweet.

aw. we just reached halfed of the total pictures.

The fun is just starting.. ^^

HERE COMES..

Sarah/Shasha and JASMINE . again.

Anyways. i think sadiQ will only respond to sarah/shasha with the clip on his hair.
The other day when i'm trying to call him(without his clip, however hair is still tied up),
he didn't respond to both shasha and sarah. i have to try so many different names to get his attention. And yea. in the end.. he responded to SadiQ.

OH yea. i'm also wondering what's with Jasmine and SadiQ. Because i thought sadiQ is with Gabriel ? Omg. This is confusing.

Next is a calm one. Because i believe i'll be killed by Hafiz if i comment about it.

There. Nothing much. Just Friends.

I have also no idea what's with Sarimah..

The other day when i commented that CPC and I might not last as i kept seeing her with other 2 girls, namely Vanessa and Daziree, Sarimah offered that she will be my next love. LOL !

By the way, that's Sarimah with Sandy ~

Next is abit scary thou.

And i shall not comment on it. NOT a bit.

Ok. NOT commenting.

After the next picture.. The fun is really coming..

I have no idea why i saved this picture.
Totally the last to choose as a pair of Scandal.

But they look nice. sweet.

So i just thought i will post them out for fun.

The next picture is really cute. In a way..

yes. Jasmine will be there.

If i'm a outsider.. I would probably think..
Willie kept that Tuba with him to prevent Gabriel from going near Jasmine.
To prevent him to stuff Gabriel into the tuba. =/

The next picture would be totally for Jasmine and Gabriel.

Laughing Out Loud. HAHAHHAHAHA.

Next is a weird one.

Most probably dancing. ^^

Something fishy with the next picture.

If you were to take a close look. (which cannot be done in my blog, because the pictures can't be clicked.) You can spot the 2 Guys wearing Something on their hand.. that is the same.

DO wonder what it mean. DO WONDER. =)

Next is just dragging PAtricia into the crowd.

Other than that.. It's actually nothing at all. Because Aizat and Darul is nothing new.

And. Couple wear is still in the trend.

Sweet ya ~
weiwei, you're lucky. =)

aw aw. There actually no link from me to anyone.
But eggs would be thrown before anyone believes it.

So, i'll just have to drag Enoch into the crowd too.

Nothing actually. Just Enoch, me and flowers.

Plus.. i'm not into Boys. Sorry.

I'm into MAN. I'm looking for ManFriend. not boyfriend. =/

chill.

I love the last 2 pictures best !

They are like the best of the best.

First..

Ahem. I'm coughing.

From what i heard is.. Godwin doesn't know how to tie his tie. So, Vanessa is helping.

BUT ! I'm wondering.. The other guys doesn't know how to tie ties too ?
Because, The both of them are now at the BACKSTAGE.

I'm sure there are other guys in to dressing room who knows how to tie a tie.
Ops.

Heheheh !!

Well well. We've come to the end of the post.. And i'm really thanking SJ for the wonderful pictures..

Here comes....

THIS.

I'm not sure why i like this picture so much.

It just triggers alot of thinking.

Are you thinking too ?

(Zoe, you dun have to think, no twiddling of fingers too.)

Hehs. Everything ends here. ^^ Hope you enjoyed.

-

Well. Some words to say..

I'm sure we are all happy with the Concert last Saturday.

We had worked so hard on it. And we succeeded.

Especially with Disco Lives soaring so high.

And for those who didn't know, HuiCi actually flew her drumstick backwards after the last beat of the song.

Well, i think that's by accident. But that simply means something..

She enjoyed the piece, and so did we.

This post is just for entertainment.
For bringing out some laughter after so much hardwork.

Hope you all enjoyed.

p/s. but seriously, some scandals in the post are REAL. create your own wonders. ^^

Cheers. loves to Rpws ~

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Wednesday, 12 September 2007

ANNOUNCEMENT TO RPWS peeps !

Aww ! Hey Guys. I searched on and found real juicy gossips.

Do Visit for the next post.

" SCANDALS "

I believe it will be one of my favourite !

I'm still trying to gather as much resources asap.

IT WILL ROCK THE ENTIRE BAND ROOM.

- no promises. But I believe it will be good ~

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Took some pictures last week.

Unique sky.

Interesting.

Hm. Beautiful? no, not really...

Life is hard.

Sometimes you just want to take the perfect shot, but you just missed it.

My new class is out.

Yea. i mentioned it before, every semester, Rp will re-shuffle our classes.

New people. New adventures?

Hahs. I'm always nervous with new people.

It's a fear i think.

Because peoples' first impression of me is always "proud, selfish and arrogant"

Well, maybe it's true. i don't know.

And from all my friends, good frens, EX-classmates..

They hated me when they first know me. well.. first SEE me, i think.

Because they think i'm someone who they will never mix with. Selfish pathetic girl.

Until they know me, which is after they talk to me, THEN, they will find me not so bad afterall.

But that is AFTER they talk to me. So i'm going to make sure i talk to all of them first?
Sigh..

348 girls told me before that they didn't like me on first impression too.
Like, when they first see me.

Until we actually mixed together, then they felt quite ok with me.

It's quite hurtful. Because i never knew.

Do i really look that proud? So hard to mix with? LOL.

I don't know.

When Poly life started, i thought if i smile more, everything will be fine.

But when u smile more, people think you're not your real self, and they started disliking you.

That's what happened in poly first sem. I'm only able to mix with the guys in the class, and they call me a GUY too. BEcause they say it's so easy to talk to me. Well.. Guys.

But for the girls, it took me 2 weeks to actually able to mix with them.

It's painful. Hard.

2 months later, me and a few of my poly close friends are sitting down on the table and talking about how we met, whenever it's on me, they would say " hey, no offence ya.. i didn't like you when i first see you... " " you are opposite my table.. and u look really proud. i never think i'll be friends with you "..

THAT is hurtful. But i smiled with it. BEcause we're friends now.

But when u really sit there and think, it's like.. "woah, everyone hates me".

How's that gonna feel?

It's going to happen again. in a few days time. when the semester starts.

Sigh.

I have loads of friends. really.

But i daresay, most hated me at the start. No beacuse i did something wrong,
but because i looked too casual. something like that. Maybe.

Life is hard.

Save me. =/

I hate every first day of school.

Someone please tell me it's going to be fine.

Sigh.

worries.

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Tuesday, 11 September 2007

Bloo saved the day.

Yesterday night was one of the earlier nights that i slept.
3.30am.

Well. compared to the other days of 5am or so, yesterday was early.

I actually thought that is a good thing, because i'll be getting more sleep.

However, i was wrong.
I had a nightmare.

This nightmare had always been the same. For the past few years.

It is too painful for me to be telling you all the nightmare, because it haunts me.

It had been a while since i had this same nightmare. Really a long while.

Was shock when i jumped up from bed yesterday night having the image of the nightmare so clear in my mind.

It was 4.30am. I can't get back to sleep.
Actually thought of waking my sister up. But she have to work in the morning.

So i just thought i would on my laptop and listen to songs to calm myself down.

It didn't help, because my heart is beating so fast that i can't seem to find the right song to calm myself down.

So i went through my pictures folder. I have loads of pictures.

So i went through each folder by each folder, Family, Friends, 348, Poly frens, Rpws, cousins, food, sceneries, private, special....

I have LOADS of pictures.

Then i got to this picture. It is one of the newest picture i have.

Picture of Bloo.

Lol.

The only picture that made me laugh.

This little cute thing is call Bloo.

So sweet and blue.

So i just stared at Bloo for the longest moment.
I think it's 15 mins.

Plain staring.

And i got calmed down. And so i return to sleep.

Yea. One of my Happy Ending Day.

True. Didn't know a small picture like that can actually be my saviour.

And i'm really glad the nightmare is over.

Ahs.

Life.

Life is hard.

Never ending fears.

Randomly, i would like to add that..

I'm reading the collection of books from Julia Quinn.

There's 8. I'm on the 4th one.

Romance novels.

Yea. It's all about the Duke and Viscounts.

All the royal royal kind of characters. - my favourite.

Each time i finish a book, i will sit there and think.

" If only it's real. "

But sadly, we all know, fiction stories .. will always be fiction.

yikes. If ever one of you want to sit down and read something real nice with a sweet happy ending, you may try Julian Quinns' .

And sorry, dun try borrowing from me =/

I'm done with borrowing of books. It just don't come back to me.
And that caused my HarryPotter collection to be lack of Book 1.

Hms. Life. It is always better to imagine your life that to live it.
But it is always needed to lived than needed to be imagined.

Cheers.

p/s. weiwei, no worries. try again the next time ^^

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

The cause of my sleepless night. -3am

my wonder of us. we. together.

what are we?

are we strangers? are we acquaintances?

are we lovers? or are we something more?

what are we?

i wonder.

who are you to me. and who am i to you.

how do you see me. and how do i see you.

What are we. what are we.

i wonder.

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;

Sunday, 9 September 2007

AWW ~

The Concert Ended with the loudest applause i have ever get so far.

It was success. It was RWPS' first debut concert !

There're mistakes here and there. But you cannot compare us with SP.

Their freshman recruitment would be our total band strength already.

Yas. It was nice. The concert is really nice.

When u receive the applause, you know your efforts is worth it.

Hahas.

Really thanks to EVERYONE that came to support ok !

There's My family, My 348 girlfriends, My friends and My dear dear Juniors !

My juniors sat on the first 3 rows. which took up about 30 seats, they kept shouting my name. SO paiseh =/ Although it was nice of them to do so la. but... it's weird. hahaha.

REALLY thanks to you all ok !

My phone was dead early in the morning. No idea why.
I remember i charged it the night before. but .. HAha. who knows what happened.

So i can't take picture with it at all. saddening.

So i'm depending on everyone else that took pictures.

First of all.

Ta DA !

Concert Programme booklets ~

I really took quite a few home.
I love concert booklets. Really like them. no idea why.

Hm. Next will be. ME. Haha. PIcture of me.

Abit different from usual. My sister helped me with the make up.

Then then..

Full band during concert. -By Rachael.

I see someone.

Okays. Next is ..

Let me see. So.. That's, Patricia, Yani, Sandy, Fi, Me and Jasmine. ~

Hehs. abit blur ah.

Hehs. Actually there's more pictures, but it's with SJ.

SJ is sick. I think it's from the concert. Too tired and all.

SJ Get well soon ok !

Okays okays.. well well.

Wilbur gave me flowers ! Woo !

But that's not any big news or smth. Cos he gave me 2 stalks only =/

Blah. HAhaha.

I felt weird holding the 2 stalks of flowers la. So i gave one to CPC.

CPC is my dear 4 days love.
Yea. We're officially dating.
Hees.

Then, holding 1 stalk of flower looks even odder.
So i gave it to Enoch, who is already holding 1 stalk of rose.
That makes it 2 stalks. So he can give it to another person or smth.

Hahha. Then me and him took picture !

Haha. ZOE, DUN cough. DUN twiddle your index fingers. DUN draw circles on the floor.

hehe. Enoch held the flowers like he is giving it to me. =.=
Then sandy say she will borrow us her flowers.

Didn't expect Enoch to take it. But he did .. That's super funny.

BEcause it became even weirder.

What's even more worth laughing is.. Enoch is eating a lollipop. =/

NOT that he Can't. Just.. Hahaha. he looks super kid la .. Zzz..

Ahs. That was nice.

I took pictures with WEiwei too.
there's one that was nice. But Aizat and HuiCi came running across while taking the picture.
so.. the picture is.. not that nice afterall.

Then we took another one. Hm. From what i see in SJs' Camera..

The Picture isn't that nice.

Damn. HAHA. wasted la. was talking about this photo-taking thing with weiwei since like.. LOng ago ? zzz. Nah. NEver mind. Next time take again ba.

The pictures are all with SJ. So i will post it when she recover and online.

Then then. End of pictures from concert day.

will post the rest when i get them. ^^

Ahs. i forget to tell a amazing thing. On the concert day, my phone was dead. switched on the phone when i reached home. I received 15 messages. Woots. Never been so many for a long time for just a day before.

Really thanks to those who smsed me lucks and sorry for not being able to reply. =)

--

So so. Dennis went back to Sabah. My sis and I sent him off at the airport.

That's me and him.

Yea.

Then after that, my sister went to this shop to fix her Saxophone.

It's a new shop. So i took some pictures of the item there.

...

Oh ya. Before i send Dennis to Airport, i had Piano lesson.

I kept slapping myself to keep myself awake.

My teacher got angry with me half asleep and not able to play..

She suggest i go home.

Yea. THat's what i'm thinking at the first place. LOL.

Didn't want to go for the lesson at all. But was poured water by my father.

Yes. POURED WATER. So well, yea. No choice.

-Dahs-

I guess this is all i have for this post.
More pictures coming up ~ ^^

Loves ~

Good Night ~

- I guess this is a beautiful mistake too... ;